Knightmare Tower Game

Knightmare Tower - Slice and Dice launch game with astonishing levels of style

Princess Problems

What is it with princesses and the inability to remain un-kidnapped for even five minutes in the fictional world? Real-world royalty never seem to have this problem, but make your way to the cinematic realm or video-game world and royal robbery is rife! Super Mario was based entirely on princess pinching and that was a corker of a game, so how does Knightmare Tower measure up to the greats? Well firstly, I was only using Super Mario as a comparison and will therefore not be comparing this game to said classic, but JuicyBeast are adamant about playing right into the stolen princess stereotype with a rather unique and supremely stylish, upward-scrolling launch game with more than just a little hint of arcade. Your merry knight is ready to launch in an upwards direction to somehow save the princess by slaying a multitude of decidedly ugly enemies: you game? Well you should be, because this is a flash game with some clout.

Princess Saving 101

In order to rescue the royalty, you must first launch your knightly hero into the air by pressing the downwards arrow when the indicator is as high on the gauge as possible ( the higher the indicator when you stop it, the more powerful your launch will be). Once you’re in the air, you must attempt to move with the directional arrows and attack the enemies by landing on them and slicing them (automatically) with your sword. Don’t worry if your miss an enemy and plummet off the screen as your launching vehicle should have you back up at viewable altitude in no time, that is unless lava bubbles up from under the screen; this is how you know sh*t’s getting serious and that one poorly- timed swoop down onto an enemy can result in certain death. Gold is earned for your efforts in each round and it can be spent on upgrades in the shop. You getting this? Good, because it’s outrageously simple and I’d hate to think that basic information cannot be assimilated and followed.

Advanced Heroing and Bravery

Don’t get too carried away with your sword swiping since you will encounter enemies of various size and potential for harming you. Some enemies simply float about not doing very much and waiting for death but others like the blue orbs of troll-level ugliness will occasionally and suddenly grow spikes for a little while, contact with which will lose you one of your three lives. Keeping your knight bouncing for as long as possible by slicing up as many foes as you can is really all there is to it, aside from the upgrades.

Having upgrades in a game isn’t a new thing, and nowadays it’s actually an expected feature whose absence creates outrage and a strong case of quitting the game immediately and finding a better one. As you earn gold, you can purchase upgrades to your sword, your boots, your rocket, and your armour; peripheral upgrades such as increased luck, oil to limit the reduction in speed when encountering an enemy, and speed bonuses are also a thing here, apparently. Gold can also be earned by completing quests, and personal satisfaction comes from the completing of the achievements.

Introduction to Infallible Gaming

Due to its unreasonably brilliant gameplay and terrifyingly addictive format (the upgrades are the reason that I don’t have any free time anymore), Knightmare Tower is up there with one of the best launch games I have ever played with longevity that you don’t often see in the genre. Couple this with the stylish cartoon-like illustration and highly polished design of everything from the brilliantly-drawn enemies to the menus that fit in perfectly with the mock-knight style, and you’ve got a winner of biblical proportions. That means huge to those that don’t like to mess around with the particulars of the English language.